online dating

The sociology of online dating

Having now worked as an online dating coach for over two years I enjoyed putting together my observations on this fascinating social phenomenon for a recent talk on  The Sociology of Online Dating to The Sydney Institute.

Online dating came along just at the right time – a magical solution for a world where many people now spend long periods of their lives unwillingly unattached. There are lonely twenties and thirties something singles, optimistic divorcees keen on chancing that second marriage market and all sorts of older single folk hoping to find someone to add a spring to their step.Online dating sites are doing a remarkable job bringing many of these people together.

The overall figures are staggering with up to 1200 people each day signing up as members of the largest site, RSVP.  Nielson research last year found most Australians (51 per cent) had either tried online dating or would consider doing so.

This is fast becoming the mainstream way singles find each other. It’s an extraordinary success story.

I covered many of the topics I find myself discussing each day with my dating clients. Issues like:

  • Where are all the men?
  • How men behave in a buyer’s market
  • Helping older women come to terms with their declining market value
  • Why so many older men are broke?
  • Who achieves success in online dating?

You might enjoy the lively Q&A session as well, with plenty of questions from people keen to learn more about this intriguing new world.





3 Responses to The sociology of online dating

  1. Kirsty Ferguson (@KirstyPinstripe) September 19, 2014 at 11:19 am #

    HI Bettina, yes we are all trying it and all hopeful and, it can be rather good for the ego. I would like to ask Australian men however, where has all the sophistication gone where has the effort to make a good impression gone? I site my own recent experiences…men turning up for a home cooked meal in board shorts, turning up for drinks in track pants, turning up for a lunch date and expecting me to pay an entrance fee, calling me loudly and in public DARL!!! Call me old fashioned but a bit of effort and manners guys, actually neither are old fashioned and if you want a classy gal they are essential. There, I’m done!

  2. Maggie January 1, 2015 at 12:07 pm #

    Oh yeah I’m right with you on that one. Men can be clean and well groomed but arrive with shirt hanging out on one side with some tummy showing…ooooww horrible. I do love men though…and I think I deserve a nice one… please send me one ASAP HAHA

    • Bettina January 28, 2015 at 7:32 am #

      There are plenty of nice men out there. Sure some do turn up on first dates looking dreadful but women sometimes do equally horrible things. In this business it is important to remain positive and be kind and courteous. Good luck with it all!